Things I am Learning

Go deeper, my child, deeper...

Go deeper, my child, deeper...

I’ve decided to use this time alone as a retreat of sorts. While outwardly I go about my daily routines – work, read, feed the cat, go to the play – I’m trying to explore what it is I truly know about myself and my existence, and what of that knowledge really matters. So here are some examples I’d like to share:

* Not having a car, at least for nine days and counting, is not so bad. This assumes, of course, you stocked up on big and bulky grocery items beforehand; you have ready access to public transportation; the weather is slowly becoming more spring-like, to make walking and riding more appealing; and a director who lives in the same house is willing to drive you home after rehearsals. Otherwise, waiting for an Ashland bus after 11 and then walking the rest of the way home would probably not be too fun. Oh, and a Trader Joe’s and a killer liquor store just down the street from your house are key too.

* Solitude brings out some less-than-good habits. I feel like I’m eating and drinking more. Definitely sleeping more. Interacting less, except with the actors, but even that is not constant or deep. I talk to the cat more. Not sure if that is a good or bad thing.

* You can go without flushing the toilet for about a day, and it’s really not that offensive. Assuming it’s just piss. And the temperature doesn’t get too high.

* I have way more pairs of underwear than white socks, so if I could go barefoot,  I could probably not do laundry for about 2 weeks.

* Eating leftover pizza every night is pretty much ok, though I do miss actually cooking. This is a play-related decision, not some isolation-induced obsession. When the schedule lightens up, I will cook more.

* One week apart from your significant other can be healthy. After that, assuming you actually like the person, it gets a little lonely.

* God did not intend toilet paper to hang from the rear, as I once thought. Or else I have been brainwashed from doing it the other way the past 10 years.

* Late nights alone can be fun, as long as they’re not too late or too frequent. No one ever asks you to turn the stereo down or stop singing along with the music.

* Some days I barely feel the Ativan and three or four beers I down on top of it, but other days they really throw me off my game. But at least I’m not driving!

* I’m convinced I exude some sort of sexy, singleness scent that makes more women attracted to me than ever.  I just don’t think the women  are convinced. And that’s starting from a very low base number.

Well, that’s it so far. Pretty profound, I know. We’ll see what the next few weeks bring, Of course, I won’t be alone; my sister is coming for a visit next weekend, then I go back east for a visit. These first two weeks of the separation are really the most isolated. If can get through them, the rest is cake. And any new insights will simply enrich my already deepening inner life.


~ by mburgan on April 17, 2009.

6 Responses to “Things I am Learning”

  1. Just to clarify the toilet paper comment, did you mean “rear” as in ass or as in the back of the roll?

    And which women are you trying to convince?

  2. Ah yes, that’s the rear or back of the roll, not the rear of the ass.

    All of em, or at least any of ’em that will have me.

  3. “God did not intend toilet paper to hang from the rear” can mean different things to different people, and if certain people have not read certain previous blog posts, this statement can mean something quite unintended. Haha.

  4. Ah yes, and thus I have learned another useful thing on this solitary journey…


  6. But that’s been true for about 40 years. Thanks for your concern, though.

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